As I’m sitting here contemplating which of my insights I want to write a power paper on this time, my children are in the other room fighting with each other. Amidst all the screaming, hitting, boobing, and irrational behavior – I am experiencing pain. I’m pretty sure they are also.
This makes me think about a discussion a friend and I had about a phrase she ran across a number of years ago. She didn’t understand what it meant but had kept it in the back of her mind and occasionally thought about it. Here it is:
“I don’t give a hoot about the simplicity on this side of complexity
But I’d give my right arm for the simplicity on the other side of complexity.”
As she tried to wrap her mind around some possible meanings, she came to the conclusion that complexity can be a synonym for trials, adversity, challenges, pain, pressures, stresses, etc. And knowing something prior to experiencing it, is not as valuable or as meaningful as knowing something after going through the process of obtaining that knowledge first-hand.
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| The Refiner's Fire |
Some parallels that I see through the physical world might be:
Simplicity Complexity Simplicity
Metals Refiner’s Fire Purity, Strength
Batter baker’s furnace Cake
Money Management Insufficient funds - desperation Money Stewardship
In relationships:
Simplicity Complexity Simplicity
Sympathy Experience Empathy
Professed faith Challenge Obtained knowledge
Appearances of Peace – Façade Change of Heart Genuine Peace –Charity
And in the BIG PICTURE:
Simplicity Complexity Simplicity
Pre-existence Earth life Judgement & Eternity
Even though the material or knowledge may be the same on both sides of Complexity - The Complexity changes the end product, removes impurities or puts it through the test.
It’d be nice to think that avoiding the complexity could be a possibility – and in some cases, it is. Such as, one can avoid the higher risk of lung cancer by choosing not to smoke. But in most cases, avoiding the challenge not only forfeits growth, it also is a sure recipe for experiencing that trial again at a later time, probably in a different form, but the lesson that must be learned is the same. It’s as if we have certain lessons that must be learned and some of them cannot be learned in any other method than hands on. Life’s lessons don’t seem to be as simple as the pain of learning in a classroom. They usually are character building, such as patience (my least favorite), trust, faith, wisdom, and humility.
My natural instinct is to avoid pain – at all costs, but the very avoiding of pain causes prolonged pain. As we resist the pain of the complexity, we may get a brief breather, but the process is bound to come again, more intense and more determined to make us learn and grow. My children are the perfect example. Some failed approaches to dealing with contention is to be stronger with authority (‘that’s enough, Knock that nonsense off’), punish those who are participants, even if one isn’t at fault (‘if you can’t find a way to share, then nobody gets to use it), or to referee for a little while until everyone is tired of the pointless pursuit and change directions. Ah – Peace. But it’s only the façade of peace, an imitation, no resolution actually took place, no change of heart, no maturity developed or love deepened. And so when contention takes place again (which it must), the pain is increased. The expression ‘Those who do not learn from the past, are destined to repeat it’, applies in our personal past as well as earth’s history.
I recall a number of years ago, my brother and I were having a discussion about the lessons our bodies teach us about pressure. It was an unusual topic but the examples that he gave were – should I say, quite memorable. He mentioned that good usually follows the pains of the pressures. When I asked for a for instance, he said - a bowel movement…, a woman pushing the baby’s head out…, or the tearing of the muscle tissue during weight training. Once we work through the burn and discomfort of the pressure, we are better for it, the relief is earned and more rewarding than if we gave up and quit (which you might be able to do with weight training but it’s not really an option with a bowel movement or the birthing process). And now that I think about it, my labors that were the easiest and most rewarding were the times that I totally relaxed and embraced the pain (the midwife could tell I was having a contraction because I went completely limp and relaxed). As I visualized the good that was coming about because of this intense pressure, it gave the pain purpose and made it simpler. And I’ve experienced similar results in other aspects of pain as well.
So I understand that when I’m experiencing pain - I can become bitter or better. I can choose to be the victim or the victor. I can resist and repeat or embrace and be empowered, surrender and survive. But what choice do I have that will bring the simplicity on the other side of complexity when involves other players, other’s choices, and other’s hardened hearts.
I guess like so many of life’s lessons – I practice patience, I trust God is aware and will provide for my needs, I exercise faith that Christ can heal this pain, and I humbly seek the promptings to guide my actions.
