We've begun our efforts to conquer the giants within. At the beginning of the week, I invited Washington to begin his Olympic training. We went aside and discussed what parts of his character needed strengthened or if he would like to improve on his stewardships. After listing several options, he chose the one he wanted to focus on first - Cheerfulness. He has personally struggled with this skill all his life and so hopefully this is a vital behavior that will produce positive results elsewhere also. We discussed how the natural man may resist being cheerful (slothful, lazy, looking for excuses, etc.) and how Satan and his followers know this is a weak spot for him and will exploit it every chance they get. Recognizing that this flaw was not all his own fault seemed to encourage him to engage in battle with greater ferocity.
So each time he has an episode where he may not be responding in a cheerful manner, the training takes place. The first offense is usually running around the house 10 times. If he is persistent in feeling sorry for himself, he adds 10 more times.
The results have thus far been a greater patience on my part in helping him desire to choose cheerfulness. I have a planned response and we both know his intentions are noble even if his carry through is behind. My abilty to cheer him on in his efforts and recognize his victories has increased.
He is getting some desperately needed physical exercise as well as a few moments to distance himself from whatever triggered the poor response in the first place. This allows him to reconsider how he chooses to respond.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
SIMULATION / SHOPPING / SLEEPING / SWIMMING / & SO MUCH FUN - a weekend of firsts
The timing was right, the money was there - so we did it.
Simulation
Aristotle called signaling it was time. Galileo (me) had to pretend that it was a loud, instructive order from the priesthood to grab our 72 hours kits and evacuate in 10 minutes to meet him in Blackfoot. Some of the kids were even in swimsuits - running through the sprinkler. Shakespeare and Wilberforce were grabbing all kinds of items as I was trying to get the younger kids rounded up and getting out the grab-n-go lists for us to refer to as to what we needed. I was impressed at the speed and clarity of thought that a few of the kids possessed. The sad thing was I knew it was a simulation and I was running around in circles. A few kids were panicked and Washington was going at a less than rushed pace, saying - 'I sure hope this is only a simulation'. Eventually, we grabbed what we could within the 10 minutes and took off down the road. On the hour drive, I explained that Papa couldn't tell me what was going on over the cell phone so we discussed what could possibly be wrong that would require us to evacuate when no one else was taking similar action as well as comparing our situation with similar scenarios in books. When we picked up Aristotle, he was very serious (and a little impatient it took us so long) & told us to drive directly to the airport. Once there, we all got out at the park across from the airport and debriefed and discussed what we can learn from this simulation. You could see the relief sweep over Austen and Hypatia, and confirmed suspicions on the face of Washington, Wilberforce, and Shakespeare. Joan of Arc and Enoch probably didn't think it any different from any time when we are trying to get out the door on time. (Sad story - and we're more frequently late than on time). As it turns out, we missed most of the extra items for Joan of Arc, Hypatia's 72 hour kit, sleeping bags, and all the food. If we had done this mock disaster for a 3-day camp-out (as was originally the plan) we would have been very hungry campers. But we did have ample water, socks and underwear, first aid kits, and towels. I think it was a good thing to practice for an actual emergency as well as an observation how we respond during a crisis and what is truly important to grab.
Shopping
Aristotle announced that we would be going to Lagoon from there and since most of the clothes we brought were a little too small - we were first going shopping for a new outfit. We started with the youngest (excepting Enoch since we had enough for him) and bought new shorts, shirts, shoes, complete with sunhat. Then we went to the next child on through to the parents. By the time we finished finding what each family member wanted/needed we decided to not do the entire family at one time again - exhausting - but it truly was fun since most of our clothing come in the form of garbage bags that some angel of mercy gifted us as they cleaned out their closets.
Sleeping
Some of my children have never experienced sleeping in a hotel and so the novelty of a TV and bathroom in the same room as their bed was quite a neat first. Granted they got to share their bed with a sibling but for the older children, they got the room to themselves (attached to ours of course). As is the case of most hotel visits, very little sleep actually occured, but the adrenaline from the excitement held us over. The next morning, our family practically filled the lobby for the continental breakfast.
Swimming
I know one is supposed to wait an hour after eating before swimming, but we were crunched for time, and since we didn't get to the hotel before the pool closed the night before, we went swimming immediately for about an hour and half. Then we primped and got ready for a fun day at Lagoon.
So Much Fun
After stamping our hands with a bright flourescent ink - and getting our bearings in the amusement park, we entered the first ride. My poor children have never even been to a state fair and except a trip to disney world over 12 years ago (my oldest child was only 6 years old), they have never experienced rides like this before. So it was a good thing we started in kiddieland and the rides were not fear thrillers. Gradually, we increased the magnitude of the rides and I was amused that Wilberforce was consistent at keeping her eyes snapped shut throughout the entire ride and the younger kids were eating it up. She improved over time but it still was amusing. Running from rollercoasters to centrifugal force rides to carousels to ferris wheels, we went from ride to ride to ride. The day was expiring faster than the ground coverage made - so it was agreed that we'd have to come again but instead schedule a 2-day trip. The kids chose to ride 'Wicked' for their last ride and fortunatly it was my turn to stay with the baby cause I'm not sure I wanted to experience that extreme of a roller coaster. Even Aristotle was taken aback by the instant zero gravity free fall (I think he really enjoyed the rush though).
We ended the day by grabbing dinner to eat in the car, fueling up, and starting the long journey back home while being exhausted and full of memories. On the trip down, we played games, laughed, and sweated (something is wrong with my vehicle and the A/C, windows, radio, cruise, & wipers aren't working). On the trip home, we were quiet, cold (sun gone done and one window stuck open, one window stuck closed), and sleepy. It was such a memorable trip and I'm so grateful we did it, even if the money could have been used for more practical uses such as pay bills. It was the right thing to do and our family needed to feel that abundance and freedom in our life.
Simulation
Aristotle called signaling it was time. Galileo (me) had to pretend that it was a loud, instructive order from the priesthood to grab our 72 hours kits and evacuate in 10 minutes to meet him in Blackfoot. Some of the kids were even in swimsuits - running through the sprinkler. Shakespeare and Wilberforce were grabbing all kinds of items as I was trying to get the younger kids rounded up and getting out the grab-n-go lists for us to refer to as to what we needed. I was impressed at the speed and clarity of thought that a few of the kids possessed. The sad thing was I knew it was a simulation and I was running around in circles. A few kids were panicked and Washington was going at a less than rushed pace, saying - 'I sure hope this is only a simulation'. Eventually, we grabbed what we could within the 10 minutes and took off down the road. On the hour drive, I explained that Papa couldn't tell me what was going on over the cell phone so we discussed what could possibly be wrong that would require us to evacuate when no one else was taking similar action as well as comparing our situation with similar scenarios in books. When we picked up Aristotle, he was very serious (and a little impatient it took us so long) & told us to drive directly to the airport. Once there, we all got out at the park across from the airport and debriefed and discussed what we can learn from this simulation. You could see the relief sweep over Austen and Hypatia, and confirmed suspicions on the face of Washington, Wilberforce, and Shakespeare. Joan of Arc and Enoch probably didn't think it any different from any time when we are trying to get out the door on time. (Sad story - and we're more frequently late than on time). As it turns out, we missed most of the extra items for Joan of Arc, Hypatia's 72 hour kit, sleeping bags, and all the food. If we had done this mock disaster for a 3-day camp-out (as was originally the plan) we would have been very hungry campers. But we did have ample water, socks and underwear, first aid kits, and towels. I think it was a good thing to practice for an actual emergency as well as an observation how we respond during a crisis and what is truly important to grab.
Shopping
Aristotle announced that we would be going to Lagoon from there and since most of the clothes we brought were a little too small - we were first going shopping for a new outfit. We started with the youngest (excepting Enoch since we had enough for him) and bought new shorts, shirts, shoes, complete with sunhat. Then we went to the next child on through to the parents. By the time we finished finding what each family member wanted/needed we decided to not do the entire family at one time again - exhausting - but it truly was fun since most of our clothing come in the form of garbage bags that some angel of mercy gifted us as they cleaned out their closets.
Sleeping
Some of my children have never experienced sleeping in a hotel and so the novelty of a TV and bathroom in the same room as their bed was quite a neat first. Granted they got to share their bed with a sibling but for the older children, they got the room to themselves (attached to ours of course). As is the case of most hotel visits, very little sleep actually occured, but the adrenaline from the excitement held us over. The next morning, our family practically filled the lobby for the continental breakfast.
Swimming
I know one is supposed to wait an hour after eating before swimming, but we were crunched for time, and since we didn't get to the hotel before the pool closed the night before, we went swimming immediately for about an hour and half. Then we primped and got ready for a fun day at Lagoon.
So Much Fun
After stamping our hands with a bright flourescent ink - and getting our bearings in the amusement park, we entered the first ride. My poor children have never even been to a state fair and except a trip to disney world over 12 years ago (my oldest child was only 6 years old), they have never experienced rides like this before. So it was a good thing we started in kiddieland and the rides were not fear thrillers. Gradually, we increased the magnitude of the rides and I was amused that Wilberforce was consistent at keeping her eyes snapped shut throughout the entire ride and the younger kids were eating it up. She improved over time but it still was amusing. Running from rollercoasters to centrifugal force rides to carousels to ferris wheels, we went from ride to ride to ride. The day was expiring faster than the ground coverage made - so it was agreed that we'd have to come again but instead schedule a 2-day trip. The kids chose to ride 'Wicked' for their last ride and fortunatly it was my turn to stay with the baby cause I'm not sure I wanted to experience that extreme of a roller coaster. Even Aristotle was taken aback by the instant zero gravity free fall (I think he really enjoyed the rush though).
We ended the day by grabbing dinner to eat in the car, fueling up, and starting the long journey back home while being exhausted and full of memories. On the trip down, we played games, laughed, and sweated (something is wrong with my vehicle and the A/C, windows, radio, cruise, & wipers aren't working). On the trip home, we were quiet, cold (sun gone done and one window stuck open, one window stuck closed), and sleepy. It was such a memorable trip and I'm so grateful we did it, even if the money could have been used for more practical uses such as pay bills. It was the right thing to do and our family needed to feel that abundance and freedom in our life.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Training Myself to Nurture
I really admire people, mother's especially, who are so gifted to recognize and acknowledge the good in those around them. One who can look at a child's pathetic performance and the only thing they mention and/or see is their effort or progress which in turn uplifts and encourages the child. I hate to admit it, but I've got hard-wired blindness to the good, when things are amiss - so aquiring or practicing this skill has been quite a struggle for me. But I recognize the value of focusing on the positive and nurturing my sweet ones with recognition for their efforts and building a portfolio of victories. In fact, one of the purposes for starting this blog was to practice regular efforts of recognizing the good in our own lives and in my children. I may have been a little optimistic about my success at recording in the victory journal everyday, but it is happening occasionally.
I have, however, been more successful in training my children to focus on the positive verbally than through blogging. In morning devotional, we each state at least one positive review. Something good and positive that has happened to us, for us, or because of us. We've been doing it for about six month's now and the kids are becoming fairly used to the routine, at least. It's becoming easier for some of them to recognize the good - even if it is nothing more than 'getting their pre-flight done on time' or 'drawing a picture they are pleased with'. There are those days when one child can't seem to find the positive about anything in their life and they are paralyzed. Unfortunately, I've noticed that when they are paralyzed that I can't seem to see anything in their life worth being grateful for either and so I diligently search for something...anything... or work to create something to which might bring them joy.
One thing we've started this week is a positive preview. Hopefully this will be a time of goal setting, anticipation, and hope for good things happening to them. Most of them state social events in nature such as 'playing with a friend' or 'going on a trip to town', but I'm hoping they will branch off into other passions and learning projects such as 'I'm going to write a thank you card to ______ for what they did for me,' or 'I'm going to do a science project today'.
Now that I've had a little practice seeing the positive in my own life, I believe the next step in my journey is for me to recognize my children's effort, successes, and goodness. I'll be using this blog as a training tool to discipline my mind until it becomes more second nature. Since I'm only writing a few thoughts per child I'll focus on the ones that each child seems to particularly have a struggle in. This will be a little bit of stretch for me - especially in writing - but here goes.
Wilberforce (is the miracle child that has a natural optimism to whom I look up to for inspiration. She has for years written in her journal every night and only records victories, miracles, blessings, strengths, inspirations, and comedic incidences. So maybe if I follow her example there is hope for me) The other day, she informed us in a most decided manner that she intends to celebrate the fourth of July by entrepreneuring. I never really thought of it that way before but it does have merit since that is what the founders established our free market society to do. She also has been so diligent in her daily practice of piano that she sat down to try her hand at a simplified piece of Shubert - and it sounded fairly well. Granted it was a little choppy but not bad at all for her first time through. I'm so proud of her decision and example to teach herself to play the piano by practicing for a half hour each day. She is an inspiration to us all.
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Austen gave an amazing impromptu lesson in our devotional this morning. I'm finding that she is blossoming and growing at a phenomenal rate. One thing she taught me was about her attempts to smile and make eye contact with most everyone she meets, and though I hadn't realized this particular trait before, she does brighten every one's day with her cheerfulness. She is making courageous efforts to manage her adolescent hormones and her childish habits. When a report came that she usually keeps her side of the room clean by her roommate, I was deeply surprised by the news and beginning to think that she might be growing into some good new habits. Yeah!
Washington has spent the last couple of days with large keytones (which is very dangerous to someone with diabetes) and has been feeling really awful. He's been handling it all like a trouper and courageously admitting his hand in the lack of proper managment. Cheerfulness is something he struggles with a great deal, and so it's been amazing to see him resignedly accept this health trial in stride without throwing a pity party. I've also noticed more frequent 'yes' answers and less 'no- not yet' answers when I interrogate whether he has finished his preflight, fed the pigs, or checked his blood. I'm so grateful that he is making progress in being responsible. ![]()
Hypatia didn't want to do the dishes tonight because there was a larger than usual amount to be done, but she simply rolled up her sleeves and dug in. She was cheerfully doing them and pleasantly surprised when I joined her to help it go faster. What a treasure she is. And when we brought home a new movie that she would previously have produced behavior unpleasant to those around her, she very graciously was pleased and excited without going overboard.
Joan of Arc is such a happy, sweet child that I'm not sure where she might be struggling other than in maybe eating nutritious foods. But tonight, she did just that. After several frustrations that she couldn't have a popsicle until she finished her dinner, she was resigned to eat several big bites. She went to sleep before finishing it, but I'm pleased that she was willing to eat something that wasn't laced in sugar. ![]()
Of course baby Enoch is perfect, pleasant, and a joy in my old(er) age. Rarely fussy, eats good, sleeps good, smiles almost to where I'm tired for him, I'm truly blessed to have such a good baby.
Wow, I feel so much more genuine love and gratitude for my children. I think this will be a very good thing indeed.
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