One of the purposes of this blog is so I can record power
thoughts in my search for truth. But
this time, I simply want to express my gratitude.
A little back story:
Back in
December, my husband’s vocation was brought to halting stop. Literally . . . he was stranded in another
state. The crankshaft, in his newly
paid-in-full (now we can breathe a little) semi-truck - broke.
It wasn’t worth putting us in debt bondage again and so he looked for
other work. Eventually he found
employment that was the highest paid option and local. The best of both worlds – so we thought.
Unfortunately
with our medical bills, IRS & other tax fan mail, and mounting unplanned
expenses, we quickly found that finances were just as tight and probably
worse. After six months of trying to
juggle the accounts payable with insufficient accounts receivable, the
livestock and other assets were all sold (or are for sale) Each day (and sometimes, each hour) we found
that one more thing had gone financially awry.
The computer had a virus, the buyer (for a truck we have for sale)
backed out, the extra job he found removing a tree turned out to really be a
charity job, the bank was in overdraft, we’re stranded at home because of no fuel,
my daughter had a tooth abscess, my medication required more blood work, the
food sources depleted so I have to eat foods that adversely affect my health
(wheat, rice, potatoes, sugar). Then we
began feeling disconnected – first the internet (bye-bye facebook), then the
phone, and eventually the power. This
posed a few problems. The biggest being that our pump ran on electricity – so
no water. Other minor ones was that we
had recently put our last pig in the freezer and my son’s insulin had to be
kept refrigerated. Now our energies had
to be put to a new level of survival.
Looking for ways to fill up our water bottles (it really is amazing how
much water must be consumed/used).
Borrowing the local park or post office to charge our devices. Digging a fire pit with a grill so we can
cook food since we were out of propane.
Of
course, my knight in shining armor would problem solve everything he could for
his damsel in distress. He set up a
generator to run for four hours a day to keep the freezer from thawing completely. Eventually, he figured out how to connect the
water pump to the generator so that we could fill up water barrels and water
the garden once a day (btw the lawn has died a horrible, yellow death –
priorities you know. But the weeds are
thriving). He finally put up a
clothesline so I could have my own solar dryer.
But the
pursuits had a much different flavor now.
I hauled water three times a day to flush our indoor outhouse. I had to wash clothes by hand and so my
wardrobe had to be pretty soiled before getting washed. With no funds, all food had to be prepared
from food storage basics and on stove top or open fire. Basically, oatmeal for breakfast, fried
potatoes for dinner, and lunch was optional.
Our hair was French braided to conceal the greasy hair look, and washing
dishes was either scalding hot or beyond lukewarm cold. In a nutshell, life was challenging.
Here’s
the confusing part. Although we were not
keeping upwith the Joneses (not even remotely), we were somehow optimistic, happy, even
grateful. God’s tender mercies weren’t
always seen but they were definitely felt.
We discussed as a family what our options were and we concluded that it
was best not to go out of our way to inform others. Not so much from a pride standpoint (although
I kept checking our motives because I didn’t want to go down that road), but
because we noticed how some people who were aware of our situation not only
were uncomfortable but almost acted put out – probably because it put them in a
position of “should I help” and “I don’t want the inconvenience of having to
help”. Now I’m only guessing on that
because I’ve had those same feelings toward other friends of ours who were hard
up. (Sad, but true story)
Some of
the kids felt like this was an adventure and was confident that good things
would come of it. Others just looked at
it like we were camping out at home. Our
summer vacation. No-biggie-dah. The whole time I felt like our burdens were
being made light by the unseen hand of providence. Our prayers were not necessarily more
desperate, but were spontaneously more grateful for the little things. The generator operating when it was out of
fuel (miracles are not little things, but every little thing was now seen as a
miracle), no catastrophes with the propane or fire, time enough in the day to
get the work done, siblings working together without contention, the quietness
of no electricity (it’s very noisy, we’ve concluded) going to bed on time
because there was no light, the continuing trend of only financial trials –
instead of bigger ones like chronic illness, accident, wayward children, death,
etc.
We may
not have had electricity, luxuries, or even many necessities, but we were
definitely connected to THE source of power.
And for that I’m truly grateful.
