I've had a lot of events happen these last couple months that seem to be gearing me up for something, as I have felt closer and been filled with more desire to draw closer to the Lord than I have in a long time.
Personal Progress
I've started working on my personal progress in earnest these last couple of months. Every Sunday or during devotional personal study time, I work on it a little bit. My 10 hour project will more likely be a lifetime project but other than that, I've completed all the FAITH requirements and have started DIVINE NATURE. I'm hoping to encourage my girls to work on theirs without having to constantly remind them and hopefully I won't earn the medallion too much earlier than them.
Revelation
I've loved my new tradition of reading the inspiring words of wisdom and progress on a few of the blogs that I'm following. One theme that seems to be coming up frequently, is a greater awareness of the need for all, but woman in particular, to qualify for, receive, and respond to personal revelation. Sister Julie B. Beck is quoted and pondered over repeatedly. This has been a challenging area for me as I frequently see the Lord's interaction in the footprints behind me, but rarely recognize his guidance at the moment. I'm happy to say that with concerted effort, prayer, and searching, I'm in the beginning stages of recognizing the Lord's intervention in my life at the moment that it happens. Actually, I'm in awe at the amount of intervention I receive on a daily basis. Now plans are being made on how to help my children recognize the Holy Ghost working in their own lives.
Service
I recently gave a lesson on the importance of giving service, and as most lessons, I got much more out of it than I'm sure anyone else has. I have struggled with the ability to give service outside the walls of my home - money restraints, thoughtlessness, time constraints, unsure priorities, and just plain not in the habit of it. So I've been making a concerted effort to do some type of service everyday. Yes, I plan it on my to-do list. I'm hoping with my prayers for opportunities, mixed with my attempts to heed promptings when they come and my best effort of seeking opportunities, that serving will become a strength and part of my nature. But for right now, it takes a lot of work on my part. Unfortunately, there are still a great many days that at the end of the day, the only thing I didn't get done was the service I had planned, but I do have some successes, and am confident that the Lord will change my nature if I'm persistent in my petitions.
Passover/Easter
We were invited to join a friend for their celebration of the passover this year. It was beautifully done and brought extra meaning to our own celebration of the Atonement when we partake of the sacrament. I'm considering starting this tradition but still would like to create a family remembrance celebration with the restored gospel truths as the purpose. We'll see what happens. I had intentions of studying the last week of the Savior's life the week before Easter, but my intentions were swallowed up with urgencies and reactions. And to make matters worse, I sunk into some type of depression because we were without funds to buy anything to put into the kids baskets. I spent an entire day trying to brainstorm creative items to make to put in the baskets, but everything I could come up with still required some type of purchase. So I shut down in regard to the holiday, and when my husband realized we didn't have any candy for the baskets, he spent $50 on junk easter candy that was supposed to go to a nobler cause. By this time I didn't even care that he used our money foolishly, but I did feel a little guilty that I could have bought supplies to make something meaningful for a lot less money. Hopefully next year will be more proactive regarding this holiday.
Scripture Journals
One of my favorite inspirations I've received has been to begin a scripture journal. In the past I've used notebooks or a loose leaf paper occasionally when I was clarifying something in my own mind. I've also marked my scriptures or verbally discussed verses meaning. But the transformation that has taken place from writing down the verse reference followed by a paraphrase of the principle/doctrine outlined and additional insights, thoughts, and questions has caused me to ponder the scriptures like never before. I covered a composition notebook with fabric and it is exclusively for me to record my learning from my scripture study. Whether this becomes a family keepsake/heirloom or just a tool for my own growth, I don't know but I am grateful for the sacred moments of pondering God's word and how it applies in my life. I'm hoping to follow the suggestion and do it as a family so that I can teach my children to feast upon the word of God also.
Prayer Petitions
During Sacrament meeting, a speaker commented how we should emphasize a majority of our prayers in gratitude for answered prayers. As I pondered this, I realized that I am not very effective at remembering what it was I prayed for and therefore was not expressing gratitude when my prayers were answered. So I started taking my journal & pen with me when I prayed. As I was communicating my desire, I would jot it down in my journal and over time have developed quite a long list. The results have been surprising. I not only can have a record of my requests so that I can immediately and frequently express gratitude but my petitions have been more consistent and the desire has worked in me as I ponder it more and deepen my dependence on the Lord. Many times I review my list prior to praying (or during) and engage in a conversation with the Lord that is truely exersizing my faith more. I am truely grateful.
Approaching Zion
I watched a DVD called 'Celestial Education' that has opened my eyes a little wider to the purpose of my educating my children. It explained the different levels of education as Telestial (compulsary, entertaining, minimum required - Star), Terestial (inspired, seeking truth, love learning - moon), and Celestial (Fulness of light and truth, guided by the spirit, mission driven - Sun). I knew I had something with TJEd that was by far better than public school, but now I look forward to more fully incorporating the the Celestial Education into our schools so that we can be more effective instruments in building Zion, removing the curse, and fulfilling our pre-ordained missions.
When sharing this with my husband, we were also instructed by the bishop to look at 'another perspective' of family finances. We only started the lessons but I'm so impressed at how it also put emphasis on our stewardship - versus ownership - to consecrate our earnings to the Lord. I'm hoping as I study this more that it will help to change my heart to become the zion person the Lord needs me to be.
Burdens Made Light
Unfortunately, Aristotle has been out of work for most of the spring, and as the wet weather continues, he still hasn't picked up a lot of sources of income. This probably counts more as a blessing than a spiritual growth, but when I compare it to other times that we have been struggling financially, I can't help think that the Lord is helping us to grow, to be patient, and to exercise faith that he will provide for us. Times have not been easy and we are doing without a lot of things. I don't think I've made it into town for over a month. But I have hardly noticed the hardships because it seems so insignificant compared to the blessings we've been experiencing. I've also had an unusual amount of illnesses and incidents that I have put more trust in the Lord because of them. A back ache because my back was out (couldn't even roll over or pick up my baby - let alone walk), pink eye (closed shut within 24 hours and very painful - and I might add very ugly), several colds and illnesses that spread throughout the family.
Those are only a few of the highlights because as I grow closer to the Lord, it seems to affect and improve so many other areas of my life. I'm truly loving the process and want to keep the growth happening.
