Drawing the Line

Based on this address by Elder Christofferson

Over the last couple of years, I’ve had the opportunity to interact with some pretty diverse beliefs. Everything from fatalistic atheists to exploring pagan to devout Christians to neglectful apostates and many others in between.   

And it has been fascinating! 

In my search for truth, I look at each of these beliefs for parallels and consistent themes as well as the variants that wander from the unified elements.  Did I mention this has been fascinating. 

What it seems to come down to is differences as to where one draws the line.  The line where one adopts certain points and questions others.  The line where one takes responsibility for their own choices and blames (or gives) to others.  The line where one supports an idea but the response is . . .  shall I say . . . different.  And sometimes inconsistent (That’s a polite way of saying twisted).  This line is what provides such a variety of ideas in the Great Debate. 

It is a very defining line. 

Recently, an apostate LDS turned “Christian” was campaigning to “save the misguided mormons”.  As I looked at what they left for what they adopted, I realized the line made life much more convenient for them.  I wonder how many mormons have falsely understood the line of grace - confused which part is mine and which part is yours.  (Refer also to Brad Wilcox talk on "Grace is Sufficient".  It is awesome!)  If responsibility lies only on Jesus, then the objective (in this case – salvation) becomes so much easier.  I have to wonder how much of belief or drawing the line is based on convenience. 

It certainly is more convenient to say there is no God at all when one is confused and can’t understand something or feels they’ve been dealt with unjustly.  It certainly is more convenient to worship things that can be seen and felt and touched rather than operate on faith that the unseen hand of Deity is somehow involved.  It certainly is more convenient to play and focus on the fun in life rather than dedicate oneself to a life of purpose and covenant. 

Interestingly, one side of this line holds on to points that can’t or won't be sacrificed – such as being humane, or faithful to spouse, or their Savior, or . . .  whatever is hardwired in the individual's make-up as true. 

But there are dangers in this line drawing.  If one plays the blame game (where others - government -  God - or - ‘Jesus’ is responsible for our situation) the result is disempowerment in our choices and if the line is wrong, justice still must be served somehow. 

If one picks and chooses their moral compass as they would choose what to put on their plate at a buffet table, it doesn’t somehow mean the other dishes didn’t exist, nor does it mean they are not responsible to eat nutrient dense truths along with the dessert truths.  That may be a poor analogy but you get the idea.

If one has a foundational truth, but over prioritizes and/or omits others, that doesn’t make the other truths null and void. 

One thing is certain.  The line is extremely important.  There are true truth.  There are absolutes.  Drawing a line that doesn’t include a belief in gravity, doesn’t prevent one from falling down to the earth.  Drawing a line that doesn’t include a belief in justice, doesn’t prevent justice being served.  And drawing a line that doesn’t include a belief in walking by faith, doesn’t prevent the necessity of it. 

Conversely, there are also absolute lies and deceptions. And so a line has to be drawn somewhere.

So while drawing your line in the sand, it is extremely important to search out and be as consistent as possible with the genuine line between truth and error.  

The Power of Unity

I feel Alone.

I understand that I’m not alone, but there are times that I feel alone and completely powerless.  What can be done?  Others have their agency and are free to act for themselves and if I didn’t care about them or their welfare, there would be no problem. 

Fortunately, I do care.  But it does bring feelings of temporary hopelessness, powerlessness, and isolation. 

I think that is why this address by Elder Wong of the Seventy has been so hard for me to digest. 

It speaks to my heart’s desire, but is a painful reminder that I currently don’t have the resources that he suggests as a solution.  

I get that I do have powerful resources.  The most powerful resources – legions of angels and a loving Savior and Heavenly Father who are rooting for my and their success.  I have abundant desire and faith that the rescue is possible.  I have promises that my prayers are heard and will be answered in my best interest.  I have ample evidence and tender mercies that the above power is working in my life.  I have a loving husband and family who support me in my desire and efforts.  I have the power of fasting, personal prayer, righteous living, and the temple’s prayer circle.  I have HOPE.  I know I am not alone. 

But I don’t have a bishop, a missionary, a relief society president, an elder’s quorum president, or an Aaronic priesthood youth who are interacting in the lives of my distant friends.  Becoming friends, sharing their influence, and bringing goodness into their life.  At least not to my knowledge.  And so now I am wondering if my influence or faith or desire. . . is enough.  Elder Wong said that Unity is essential in the rescuing effort. 

I long for unity.  Especially since we live in a divided nation.  As I study the scriptures and see the need for unity in developing a Zion people, I struggle with the disconnect in everyday living.   

The City of Enoch was so united that they were translated.  The Nephites (without the -ites) were united and experienced peace for over 200 years.  And with the knowledge that, that kind of unity is necessary in order to live the celestial law, I can’t help but wonder how to bring it about.  My life’s mission is to provide a baby step in that direction. 

I’ve experienced to a small degree the power of unity in my own life.  All my life, I’ve said personal prayers and have been blessed by so doing.  But when my husband and I started holding evening couple prayers – and not just saying a prayer but really pouring out our heart’s desire and confessing our sins and seeking the Lord’s power in our lives, the prayer was different.  I could feel the Lord’s sanction of our unity and my abilities had increased as well as my desires.  We have had an increase in our love for one another and an increase of love for the Savior.  As well as an alignment of goals and communication.  Yes – Unity is powerful.

I’m not sure where to go from here, in order to COUNSEL TOGETHER of those with whom I desire to rescue from ignorance, addictions, false traditions, deceptions, and distractions.  But I reinforced my desire to be united in that effort.  And if I pray about that desire, I know the Lord will provide a solution somehow. . . . . .  someday.  

The Ponder Point

Every year for Christmas my children receive the gifts of the wisemen.  One gift represents the Gold – something to delight them, another the gift Frankinsense – something practical or useful, and one is the gift of Myrrh – something of deep meaning.  That one gift of meaning usually indicates a huge amount of time investment on my part- because sadly I’m not a very craftsy person. 

One year, I made little Sacrament Covenant Booklets, with the intent of helping the focus be on the Savior and the covenant renewed each week.  I don’t know that the gift was a great success.  If I recall, I didn’t even finish making them before the 25^th deadline arrived. (And I had every intention of completing the task in the down time between Christmas and New Year’s.    Aye, It didna happen.)

Alright, so it wasn’t a fabulous idea to make nine individualized, scrapbook style mini-books, but I do know that I developed a much deeper appreciation for the nature and purpose of the Sacrament that year.  And for many months to come.  Since I had put so much of my blood, sweat, and time into the project, I made sure to utilize it myself.

This address on the Sacrament was a wake up call that I have slipped back into habitual partaking of the emblems without accessing the power therein.  

I believe I found the point.  The point that makes the difference.  Habitually going through the motions of once a week taking the sacrament is good, but to receive the cleansing, healing, renewing, and deeply spiritual experience, there has to be something more.  That something is PONDERING. 

I’m as guilty as the next person at having my preparations for this sacred weekly ordinance consist of gathering all the family at church (since we’re all there anyway, right) and try to keep the littles quiet so as to not disrupt others.  Oh, and maybe I’ll have a 2 second visual of the Savior pass through my mind as I covenant to remember him always.  Pretty pathetic, I know, but unfortunately it has become the norm. 

But I have had times where the preparation was much richer and much, much more rewarding.

Like when I took time on a Saturday evening, or even during the sacrament itself, to reflect on the previous week.   Considering my thoughts, my words and my deeds.  Considering my effectiveness at keeping the commandments completely.  Considering whether I really exercised faith or simply touted my beliefs.   Considering the questions that plague my mind, or problems I haven’t found solutions to, or challenges I haven’t overcome yet.  Considering the aspects of my life where the atonement has already given me the enabling power to do more than I could on my own. 

That’s a lot of things to consider, especially if we are totally honest with ourselves.  In my little Sacrament booklet, I included a long list of questions to really help me to analyze where I stood.  Gut wrenching questions that if answered honestly, I always find a long list of sins that I hadn’t realized I was guilty of prior. 

The pondering point continues.  Listen intently on the sacramental prayer and review the aspects of the baptismal covenant outlined in Mosiah 18:8-13.  Such things as my desire, my willingness, my commitment, my witness as well as God’s promises.  Think on the symbolism of the sacrament, and remember.  Remembering is the key to spiritual growth and so vitally important to the purpose of the sacrament and our standing firm in our end of the covenant. 

In 1 Corinthians 11: 28-29 it states:

                “But let a man EXAMINE himself, and so let him eat of that bread, and drink of that cup.

                “For he that eateth and drinketh unworthily, eateth and drinketh damnation to himself, not discerning the Lord’s body.”

I’d never realized before that I had been only doing half of the ordinance.  If there is no examination of self, no reflecting on my progress, no introspection as part of the process, no pondering - than not only am I not receiving the full benefit of the sacrament, but I’m cutting my own throat by doing it unworthily. 

That ordinance itself takes, what, about 5 to 10 minutes each week.  That’s not a huge amount of time to examine oneself.  But apparently, the Lord feels it is enough.  Enough that if we ponder, seek forgiveness and inspiration, and recommit; that we can access the power of the atonement to clean our slate and start fresh. 

If I can just do the 3 R’s:

(1) REMEMBER

(2) REPENT

(3) RENEW

Then I feel that I have worthily accepted the Lord’s invitation to be healed, to be forgiven, to grow spiritually.

An About Face

I’ve been there.

I was carrying on a conversation, minding my own business (or so I thought), when all of a sudden, someone got right in my face.  My comments were challenged, my points were mocked and belittled, and I was even threatened to take it back or . . .  - and before I realized what was happening, I was shamed and cowered into a corner. 

My choices seemed limited at the time.  And unfortunately, I played the game – becoming super insecure and reverting into myself. 

I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was being bullied.  Pressured into doing, or saying, or thinking, or being something that wouldn’t have been my choice if I didn’t have that shaming influence. 

So when I listened to this address from Elder Robbins, I couldn’t help but grab the air and yank my elbow in.  Yeeeeessssss!!!!!

BAM!  He wasn’t sending artillery to the bully, but arming the bullied. 

The 1st weapon: Establish the “WHY”

If we are in this world to stand on our own premise, then by all means, go with whatever whim and philosophy that comes your way.  But if we are consecrated and dedicated disciples of Christ, as we covenanted to be – the decision is already made. 

I like to think of it as a self-elected representative.  What other government could an individual nominate themselves, cast all the deciding votes, and be their own check on abuses of power.   That’s what agency (free will) is.  Our own self-governing nation.  I voted myself to be a representative of the Savior.  And as His disciple, I represent Him to the people.  NOT the people to the Savior. 

I want to adopt the mantra “I do ALWAYS those things that please the father” as my ‘WHY’. 

The 2nd weapon: Recognize the game

Usually attacks occur because the ‘guilty taketh the truth to be hard

Because there are only two options on who we represent (Savior or Satan), it would be helpful to recognize the strategies used by the opposing team. 

1.        Mocking – It’s sad to realize that mocking, scorn, ridicule, fear, belittling, etc. are usually more effective, than love, acceptance, forgiveness, patience . . .   The other team uses peer pressure as a motivation. (See, I knew high school was Satan’s playground - JK)

2.       Twisting – Making evil look good and good look evil.  That’s a fairly easy strategy to identify. But when he warps or imitates our own strategies, such as love of men before love of God (inversion of priorities) or utilizing guilt to have us turn away from the right (guilt is used to turn us away from sin), it gets a little more fuzzy on which side we really are on. 

It’s kinda funny when you think about it.  The guilty are the ones spreading the guilt.  Bullies try to make one feel guilty for giving offense in regards to their choice - and the only suggestion they offer to relieve that guilt is to give offense to the Savior instead.  ‘Join the bandwagon of sinners in order to relieve your guilt of shaming me.’ Does oxymoronic carry any weight here? 

3.       Legislation – Yep, make it a law . . .  or at least petition for lower standards.  I wonder how many things I would have wrongly supported if I hadn’t learned about the proper role of government.  Satan loves to legislate his ideas into legality.  Almost any law will pass as long as it is “for the children” or “for the underdog” no matter how immoral or counterproductive it is.  The needs of the few become more important than the needs of the many or the needs of the right.  And before you know it, we’ve legislated our way into an apostasized nation. 

The 3rd Weapon:  Be Inspired!

Greatness is inspiring.  Look to the greats.  There are so many accounts of men and women throughout the ages who have stood up to the bullies they faced.  The scriptures are chock full of them.  And as you learn about, be inspired by, and begin to emulate these greats, it is amazing how empowered you become. 

Yes.  It takes courage to stand up to the bully.  And even more importantly, it takes character to stand up to the bully graciously.  But courage is the only antidote for the fear of men.  The strength of an individual - or the strength of a nation – is only in proportion to the unbending on matters of principle. 

Can it be done without giving offense?  Probably not.  It is hard to please God while not giving offense to Satan.  But it really doesn’t matter what the end result is as long as the defense (or representation) – is done IN LOVE.    

When one makes an about face, they turn or change the direction that they were facing.  And like so many of the Savior's teaching, his ways are a change from the direction the natural man is facing.  

So the next time a bully is IN YOUR FACE and you feel that you have to LOSE FACE in order to SAVE FACE, understand that is being TWO-FACED about the obstacle you FACE, and so instead, make an ABOUT FACE. 

The Individual Element

The human body.

It is fascinating on so many levels.  Each body is made up of components called organs, which are made up of components called cells, which are made up of components called organelles, which are made up of components called atoms, which are made up of components called atomic particles, which are made up of components called quarks, which are made up of components called. . . . .  and so it goes.

Each component can be broken down to smaller and smaller parts.  Each part is necessary to perform the design of that component.

Conversely, the human body can also be a component of a larger function.  For instance, a person is part of a family, which is part of a community, which is part of a nation, which is part of the world, which is part of the solar system, which is part of . . . .

Bigger and bigger. Never ending.

These thoughts crossed my mind while pondering the talk by President Boyd K. Packer.

He mentions that each member of this church is a critical element in the body of Christ.  I’m pretty sure this is a symbolic reference rather than a physical adaptation.  So along those lines, each person is a part of the family. . . ., the community. . . . , the nation. . . . ., etc… of Christ’s kingdom.  But not only that, it is the testimony of Jesus Christ, or the spiritual strength, of each member that defines His success. 

Tangent here.  I vaguely remember watching the modern version of Clash of the Titans.  It was a little challenging to stomach with the amount of artistic license that was taken.  But one of the concepts was that the Greek god’s strength was only in proportion to the belief of their followers.  And when everyone stopped believing . . .  then the “god” was completely powerless. 

I wouldn’t be surprised if Satan (or his followers) truly believe this about Heavenly Father.  The campaign to stop believing in God is strong and having great success.  I find both truth and a great error in this philosophy.  It is true that God’s glory is defined by those who worship him, and He will be successful only by us choosing to follow his plan.  But the error lies in assuming that he will be without power if we stop believing.  The only one who is without power is the one who stops believing.  Or have we forgotten the lesson of Noah.  Everyone on the earth stopped believing to the point that there was no good in them at all – so God (still very much in power, but very saddened by the lack of belief) wiped out all human existence . . .  save one little preserved ark.

So when I say the success of Christ’s kingdom is pending the spiritual strength of its members - don’t equate power with success. 

President Packer continues with the reference to the war we are engaged in against the adversary.  Stating that each and every member of the church, with a spiritually strong testimony, is necessary to win against Satan.  In other words, the people have to be united and the caliber of Captain Moroni in order for Satan to be bound. 

Again, Satan is bound already to Heavenly Father.  He is subject to obey God’s every command.  The only reason he has been allowed any power is because it provides the opposition necessary for His plan and our progress.  But Satan is not bound to me and he’s not bound to you, at least not yet.  The only way which he will be bound in this life, is if we unite ourselves and fortify our testimonies of Christ.  (Again a reference to Captain Moroni – fortifying cities against the enemy)

This earthly sojourn is our boot camp and battlefield all rolled up into one.  We are in enemy territory receiving our battle training line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little, there a little – with each critical choice we either put on armament or remove it. 

And each warrior's preparedness makes or breaks the strength of the army. 

Continuing the body analogy, if a cell (say an individual) mutates or becomes cancerous (apostates) and it starts to break down the cells surrounding them, it will eventually affect the whole system adversely.  If a cell is “luke warm” so to speak, it could be considered a fat cell (spectator members), not part of the powerhouse of the body but sits there in storage to possibly be used some day.  If a cell is actively doing its part (participating member) – magnifying its callings, applying the Sunday school answers, exercising faith – it is a healthy and productive element of the system.  Fulfilling the measure of their creation.  And when other good cells combine, it makes for a healthy organ (wards/stakes/regions/areas) and a healthy and successful body.

I’m a believer in the power of One.  I’ve seen its effect in both directions. 

The decisions an ancestor made has affected generations. The ripple effect (or the butterfly effect) truly reaches out beyond our own little circle.   Consider the influence of one person in the movie "It's a Wonderful Life".  One person can make all the difference in the lives of so many people.  

Yes, I believe in the power of One.  

So what can one person do to make a positive difference in His Kingdom.  That's simple.  Find your purpose and accomplish it.  Seek revelation and fulfill the measure of your creation.  And when we do that, and unify with others doing the same thing, the individual element becomes a legion of warriors. 

Seeking inspiration

Over the last couple of years, I’ve been writing occasionally, as power thoughts came to me.  A couple of friends on facebook would make a simple comment which for some reason would stick with me and I’d ponder on it for a length of time until I blogged what was occupying my thoughts.  There were times that I had more power thoughts than time to write about.  Lately, however, I’ve been having the desire to write (because I get so much insight from my own writing) but haven’t been able to identify anything that speaks or weighs on my mind at present.  I guess you can say I am without inspiration. 

So with my desire to continue my search for truth, I’m adapting my blogging to a different source of inspiration.  Maybe those power thoughts came so easily because they were gifted to me but now it’s time to stretch myself a little more by seeking them out.  I’m hoping to study each of the general conference addresses and ponder the message that I receive from it, enough to write about it.

   

The first address is not rich in doctrine or heavy with direction.  I guess it could be compared to the ‘State of the Union’ address given by the president of the nation.  Instead this is the ‘State of the kingdom’ given by the prophet of God. 

I find it significant that his welcome begins by relating the purpose for this world wide gathering –

Why would we gather?

It isn’t because we are all on the same bandwagon or political ideal, a bunch of fringees who like to hear someone speak in our language and our own ideas.  It’s not any type of sales presentation where they are selling an idea, concept, or product.  It’s not really a duty to listen to those that preside over us, such as the royal decrees from a king or military instructions, or even our elected officials.  It’s not like a seminar or convention where you go to the class of your own picking and choose from the ideas presented on how you might try to improve your life. 

It is a gathering of the saints (those who have covenanted with their father) from all over the world (all of his children) to listen and learn (those that have ears, let them hearken and heed) to those whom we sustain (promise to support and follow their counsel) and receive the inspiration they’ve been given for us (revealed messages specifically for this time and this people). 

What a glorious purpose!  

Then there is the summary aspect of the kingdom.  Brief but encouraging.

The prophet takes the time to express gratitude for the progress and privileges granted us in this time.  From the beginnings when conference could no longer reach all its members and how that has changed with the advanced technologies of radio, television, cable, satellite, internet, and now personal devices.  We truly are blessed to have everything available instantly.  When you consider that King Benjamin’s tower and hand written transcripts were remarkable solutions for the masses that could not hear him, to the availability of God’s word through the prophet, today – it is difficult to not feel gratitude.  And of course, our prophet is leading the way in how to observe and express that appreciation.

Not only do we have access to the prophet’s voice, he points us to the temple.  Temple dedications, rededications, and construction progress keep the vision of where we are to look and stand.  With 170 temples in (near) operation, I can see the foundation being laid for the work that we are to engage in. 

In keeping with the growth of technology and temples, the membership of the church continues to increase as the stone cut out of the mountain rolls forth.  15 million really isn’t much when compared to the billions of people on the earth, but when compared to the 6 members that the church began with only less than 200 years ago, it is quite impressive.  I wonder how that growth compares with Christianity as a whole or any of the other world religions. 

I’m trying to remember a statistic, but I may be waaaaay off.  I believe back in 1999, there were only about 15,000 missionaries.  I recall being friends with someone who was interested in comparing Mormons against Christians.  They were impressed with the number of youth who volunteered to serve.  Now the missionaries are over 88,000, my daughter being one of them, and another daughter in preparation.  I can see how the Lord is in earnest, sifting out those who hear from those who choose to be deaf. 

The major counsel given during this address is the invitation to pay attention.  Like a mother or teacher encouraging a child to pay attention so that we won’t miss something that will be of value to us later.  Some important skill or knowledge will be available, if we but choose to catch it.  He closes his remarks with the desire that our hearts will be touched and our faith increased.  It is my hope that in pondering, evaluating, and blogging about conference, that his desire will come to fruition.  

A Fringee's Frustration

“Everybody’s Doing It”

As a youth, whenever I used that argument with my father, he would break out into a boisterous song. 

“Everybody’s doing it, doing it, doing it

Picking their nose and chewing it, chewing it, chewing it”

It was so aggravating that he couldn’t, or wouldn’t, understand the importance of being a part of the crowd. 

I’ve since learned to appreciate his wisdom.  Maybe not the song so much, but the concept that the masses don’t always make the wisest choice. 

With that consideration, I’ve begun a journey which involves walking to the beat of my own drum and down a path that society might not promote or condone.   

Why have a chosen a different path?  I guess you might say my eyes have been opened and my appetite awakened.  Call me ‘Ratatouille’ if you will.   It is difficult to be content eating sewage when I know there is a banquet of delicious gourmet foods available instead. 

It reminds me of the following account.  If memory serves me correctly, Socrates was having a debate with Thrasymachus about the benefits of being just.  Thrasymachus gave case after case of convincing evidence how the ultimate objective, which is happiness, can only be guaranteed by being unjust.

 In each argument, Socrates conceded that he was correct.  But even with all this evidence, Socrates was unmoved in his opinion.   He then began to point out that all of Thrasymachus objectives - (more toys, on top, carefree & fun, a rush, etc.) defined happiness at one level and that level provided temporary pleasure.  But there is a higher level of happiness (inner peace, genuine joy, fulfillment of purpose, service to mankind, etc.) that can be obtained only by being just.  A just person may not have all the benefits of the lower level but the higher level of happiness far outweighs the cost. 

And so this journey has made me somewhat of a fringee – different than the masses, on the outskirts of mainstream.  Not necessarily a social nerd, a computer geek, or trekky (ok, I may be a trekky to small degree).  Not a ‘stuck in an era’, an animal rights activist, a rebel without a cause and ‘I make my own rules’ type of fringee.

 I’d probably call myself a ‘seeker’ type of fringee.  Seeking truth.  Seeking to preserve truth and freedom and correct principles in a world that is rejecting them.  Seeking to devote and consecrate myself to my maker.  Seeking to be a force for good. 

So here is where my frustration comes in.  The more enlightenment, empowerment, and direction I’m given, the more I want to invite others to embark on the same journey.  But because I’m a Fringee, my message is ignored. . .  belittled. . . disregarded.   The closer I come to feeling genuine love and concern for my friends who have chosen a different path, the less effective I am at reaching or influencing them. 

For example.  I keep having this recurring day and night mare.  I visualize myself standing at the bar of God on judgment day and next to me are my dear friends, associates, and even potential associates (if I would have been friendly enough to open my mouth) who did not receive a pass.  They look at me with pleading eyes, and ask why I didn’t share what I had with them while there was still time?

My heartstrings are torn and my eyes well up with tears even now simply thinking about it.  As I consider the billions upon billions of souls who had successfully become victors of their first estate but have, or are, blowing their second estate, I feel overwhelmed with grief, heartache, and compassion. 

But what can I do.  I’m considered a fringee.  Every time I attempt to invite, my effectiveness is a nill because what I have to offer is not considered mainstream.  I’m viewed as “eccentric” and overly “passionate” and have an “over the top” position.   My message, my love and concern, my desire for their obtaining genuine happiness seems to never come to fruition.  And that frustrates me deeply. 

 I suppose I could focus on the positive – and only interact with those who have already chosen to take the same journey as myself.  Have my little clique of fringees who speak the same language and leave the rest of the world to fend for themselves while they enjoy picking their noses and chewing it.  But I find no contentment there either. 

So I’m stuck . . . . . . .  a frustrated fringee.   Still engaged in the noble cause of what I seek, but feeling the pains of rejection.   

Power Gone - but not POWERLESS

One of the purposes of this blog is so I can record power thoughts in my search for truth.  But this time, I simply want to express my gratitude.

A little back story:

                Back in December, my husband’s vocation was brought to halting stop.  Literally . . . he was stranded in another state.  The crankshaft, in his newly paid-in-full (now we can breathe a little) semi-truck  - broke.  It wasn’t worth putting us in debt bondage again and so he looked for other work.  Eventually he found employment that was the highest paid option and local.  The best of both worlds – so we thought.

                Unfortunately with our medical bills, IRS & other tax fan mail, and mounting unplanned expenses, we quickly found that finances were just as tight and probably worse.  After six months of trying to juggle the accounts payable with insufficient accounts receivable, the livestock and other assets were all sold (or are for sale)  Each day (and sometimes, each hour) we found that one more thing had gone financially awry.  The computer had a virus, the buyer (for a truck we have for sale) backed out, the extra job he found removing a tree turned out to really be a charity job, the bank was in overdraft, we’re stranded at home because of no fuel, my daughter had a tooth abscess, my medication required more blood work, the food sources depleted so I have to eat foods that adversely affect my health (wheat, rice, potatoes, sugar).  Then we began feeling disconnected – first the internet (bye-bye facebook), then the phone, and eventually the power.  This posed a few problems. The biggest being that our pump ran on electricity – so no water.  Other minor ones was that we had recently put our last pig in the freezer and my son’s insulin had to be kept refrigerated.  Now our energies had to be put to a new level of survival.  Looking for ways to fill up our water bottles (it really is amazing how much water must be consumed/used).  Borrowing the local park or post office to charge our devices.  Digging a fire pit with a grill so we can cook food since we were out of propane. 

                Of course, my knight in shining armor would problem solve everything he could for his damsel in distress.  He set up a generator to run for four hours a day to keep the freezer from thawing completely.  Eventually, he figured out how to connect the water pump to the generator so that we could fill up water barrels and water the garden once a day (btw the lawn has died a horrible, yellow death – priorities you know.  But the weeds are thriving).  He finally put up a clothesline so I could have my own solar dryer. 

                But the pursuits had a much different flavor now.  I hauled water three times a day to flush our indoor outhouse.  I had to wash clothes by hand and so my wardrobe had to be pretty soiled before getting washed.  With no funds, all food had to be prepared from food storage basics and on stove top or open fire.  Basically, oatmeal for breakfast, fried potatoes for dinner, and lunch was optional.  Our hair was French braided to conceal the greasy hair look, and washing dishes was either scalding hot or beyond lukewarm cold.   In a nutshell, life was challenging. 

                Here’s the confusing part.  Although we were not keeping upwith the Joneses (not even remotely), we were somehow optimistic, happy, even grateful.  God’s tender mercies weren’t always seen but they were definitely felt.  

               We discussed as a family what our options were and we concluded that it was best not to go out of our way to inform others.  Not so much from a pride standpoint (although I kept checking our motives because I didn’t want to go down that road), but because we noticed how some people who were aware of our situation not only were uncomfortable but almost acted put out – probably because it put them in a position of “should I help” and “I don’t want the inconvenience of having to help”.  Now I’m only guessing on that because I’ve had those same feelings toward other friends of ours who were hard up.  (Sad, but true story)

                Some of the kids felt like this was an adventure and was confident that good things would come of it.  Others just looked at it like we were camping out at home.  Our summer vacation.  No-biggie-dah.  The whole time I felt like our burdens were being made light by the unseen hand of providence.  Our prayers were not necessarily more desperate, but were spontaneously more grateful for the little things.  The generator operating when it was out of fuel (miracles are not little things, but every little thing was now seen as a miracle), no catastrophes with the propane or fire, time enough in the day to get the work done, siblings working together without contention, the quietness of no electricity (it’s very noisy, we’ve concluded) going to bed on time because there was no light, the continuing trend of only financial trials – instead of bigger ones like chronic illness, accident, wayward children, death, etc. 

                We may not have had electricity, luxuries, or even many necessities, but we were definitely connected to THE source of power.  And for that I’m truly grateful.  

How Did I Become a Bigamist?!?!

And guilty of treason! 

It shocked me really. 

When I was only eight years old, I entered into a baptismal covenant with my Father in Heaven, that I would take his name upon me.  I may have somewhat naively entered into that marriage agreement with the bride groom, that allegiance with His Kingdom, that legal adoption into the House of Israel.  But hey, I was only eight years old and dutifully following my parents counsel.  Note – I have NEVER regretted that decision and there have been countless times I’ve been immensely grateful that I had. 

My life is filled with purpose and vision.  My goals are lofty and yet attainable.  My legacy is one I can be proud of. I experience both temporary pleasure and eternal joy.  I have HOPE and a guided path.  

Now, mind you, I still have the web and flow of life.  Ups and downs, trials and blessings. But overall – I have inner peace and genuine happiness.  I like what I’ve become and the potential I’m reaching for.  And my affections for my Heavenly Father continues to increase and deepen over the years. 

In recent years, I've been learning about different worldviews.  It has been an eye-opening experience for my little sheltered life.  The rest of the world seems to offer a lot of different formulas for happiness and I've been able to compare those a little with the Great plan of Happiness.  So Far, I haven’t found much of a comparison.  I found that most of them are based on some truth.  Mind you, some of that truth is severely twisted but nevertheless, it originates on the same foundation.  Because of that, I expected to agree with certain aspects of these varying worldviews.  But what I didn’t expect was to find that I, unknowingly, had adopted some of these twisted perspectives myself. 

Elements of Naturalism, Ethical and Inner Relativism were part of my hard and fast beliefs.  Justifications of Micro-Evolution had seeped into my “possibilities”.  I was feeling empowered by thoughts of Self-Actualization and Positive Mental Attitude and although I didn’t care for ‘The Secret’, I had implemented many of its ideas into my personal philosophy.  Dialectical Materialism made sense even though it was being used for what I think is a perverse purpose.  And there have been many times I’ve felt the need to resort to Pavlovian Behaviorism when dealing with my children.  Pragmatism sometimes outweighed the faith required to trust the Lord would provide.  And Libertarianism seemed like a Savior for our current political nightmare. 

Fortunately, there was a LOT of ideas that I didn't feel a connection with at all.

As I more clearly defined what the different worldviews were . . .  I could more clearly see that I was either hypocritical myself (unfortunately a very good possibility) or brainwashed into adopting beliefs and ideas contrary to my liking or choosing.  In 1961, the Supreme Court recognized Secular Humanism as a religion.  I don’t know if Material Humanism or Post-Modernism, or Cosmic Humanism, or the millions of other worldviews are officially considered a religion yet, but it made me think.  Aside from the humorous aspect that all these Atheists, Individualists, and Polytheists who hold religion in such contempt are now considered “religious” – it also makes my melting pot of mixed up beliefs guilty of bigamy, of treason, of unfaithfulness.  That’s just not gonna work for me.

I know the Lord teaches us line upon line, here a little and there a little and over time, we can attain all that he has to offer.  But obviously I forgot that the adversary works in the same manner.  Although I have been consistent at attending my church meetings and living the Sunday School answers, I still had not only been exposed to but bought into some contrary doctrine and philosophies.  

I have to admit, while I've been weighing each idea and learning about this spectrum of beliefs that others may hold, I couldn't help but conclude that "People believe the stupidest things".  Everyones life experiences, training and education, temperment and personalities vary and so conclusions vary, even with the same external variables.  It does provide for a great variety of ideas (which I love), but makes it challenging to identify the real TRUTH.

I've heard it said, that "truth needs no defense".  That is a beautiful sentiment, but obviously by all these differing worldviews, truth is the most bitterly and subtly attacked.  I do believe it will ultimately win out in the end - but with all these multiple choice options, the casualties are many.

Intrigued, I began clarifying my own beliefs - outlining specifically my own philosophy, theology, pschology, socialogy, politics, law, ethics, etc.  - and the same thing stands true . . . People believe the stupidest things!  Myself included.  At least that's probably what it appears to an outsider looking in.  Fortunately, my belief has received the second witness - the assurer and testifier of truth.  I just KNOW. 

One advantage to this little exercise, I've not only broadened my understanding of other worldviews and perspectives (and it still continues because I cannot even come close to saying I understand it all), but I've clarified and fortified my own beliefs.  Now that I can more clearly see where I'm being inconsistent, I can step back, modify my approach, and be the person of integrity I wish to be -  the monogomist, the patriot, the Faithful.

Coping with Pain

Pain

Emotional Pain

We all experience it at some point in our lives. 

*A desired relationship never comes to pass

*Or a relationship we thought was forever has turned cold

*Questions that we can’t answer . . . no matter how hard we search

*Our foundation is shaken and we don’t know what to stand on

*A loved one uses their agency in a manner you know will hurt them

*The current trial seems unbearable and unfair

*Depression that blocks any hope -trapped by rage, fear, or helplessness

*Realizing “I’m not enough”

*Trying to overcome addiction but instead experience only bondage and powerlessness

*Feeling Stuck – unable to create the change in your circumstances

*Confusion – so many choices, which one is right

*An injury or disease that won’t heal in spite of your best efforts – this is compounded pain because it is both physical and emotional

And it doesn’t seem to help knowing that everyone experiences pain too.  My pain is personal.  My pain is all consuming.  My pain is preventing me from living life on my terms.  

As I consider my own pain and witness friends and family dealing with their pain - I’ve noticed a kind of grouping as to how people generally respond. 

The Quitter

General Jar-Jar at the first sign of trouble says “me give up, me give up”.   This fatalistic approach doesn’t even put up a good fight or preserve self through flight, but goes directly to surrender.  It reminds me of the juvenile response when others don’t play the way they want them to, so they threaten “I won’t be your friend anymore!”

                Those wounded in a relationship decide to never get involved emotionally again.  Those searching for proof but cannot find it quit caring completely.  (This seems to be the response of the so-called atheists/agnostics/deists/etc. because they cannot find what they perceive as a satisfactory solution from deity.)  Those who are weak and worn simply give in to addiction/inclination/temptations.  Those who are stuck continue the same course assuming that’s as good as it gets.  Those suffering from chronic illness or injury are resigned to a life of dis-ease and give up on the search for healing.  And ultimately, those who are discouraged to the point of quitting take their life (based on the false assumption that it will stop the pain)

The Dishonest

This is the band-aid approach to pain. The zit cover-up so that our blemishes have a false front. Not really finding any healing or resolution but a coping response that frequently makes the pain worse after the cover-up wears off or adds up.  We hide in hopes that no one will seek to actually see that we are vulnerable. This is commonly seen as denial, isolation, drinking, over-eating, putting on an act that everything is amazing.

                There are all kinds of love songs that portray the ‘It’s all good’ front but secretly still holding on to the pain of being alone.  The physically injured/ill adopt a lifestyle of popping pain pills.  The confused put on a mask and pick their favorite cover-up weapon.  The addict lives in denial that anything is wrong or that they can stop any time they want to.  The limiting belief of ‘not being enough’ is over compensated with cockiness or maybe humor.  The depressed hide under their facade until such time that they cannot conceal it anymore.  The seeker simply goes through the motions, hoping that something will make sense at some point.  And life’s trials become the trigger for the unhealthy response of drinking (and for those who don’t drink – use other numbing effects such as over-eating, work, watching mindless television, etc.)

The Fighter

Ready to engage, to fight back, to create change.  Sometimes bitter or motivated by resistance or revenge.  These are the movers and shakers, the pro-active creators.  Training and fighting like Rocky Balboa or changing their stars like Sir Ulrich von Lichtenstein or Gandhi.   The fighter becomes their own Savior and rely on their own strength for deliverance.  Their heart is at war - taking matters into their own hands.

The soured relationship turns into looking for something different at best or seeking revenge at worst.  The unresolved heart sets out on a quest in search of the truth – investigating, questioning, weighing.  The concerned friend/parent sets about creating change to reach the heart of their loved one.  The overburdened puts together a plan to simplify or alter the conditions which they are experiencing.  The depressed take measures to cope with their condition in a healthy manner.  The discouraged change their focus to what they can do and choose to be content with things as they are.  The addict seeks help from qualified and supportive sources.  The trapped continue to resist the victim mode by seeking escape or salvation.  The physically hurt continues to search and apply efforts to heal and overcome. 

The Faithful

Trusting, hopeful, full of faith and vision, believing there is purpose in pain, and power in submission.  The faithful put their professed belief in God into actively exercising their faith in him.  Corrie ten Boom in the concentration camps is preserved by trusting and hoping despite her powerless circumstances.  George Washington endured the unbearable conditions of Valley Forge, believing that not only his cause was just but it was God’s will and providence that they would somehow win.  Their heart is at peace – no matter the circumstances. 

The one who is hurting in relationships turns to God for comfort, trusting that there is a valuable lesson to be learned or purpose in the transpired events – and trusting that somewhere, somehow the future will provide the companionship that their heart desires.

Those seeking for understanding continue to search but with a submissive heart - understanding that our purpose is to walk by faith and so we won’t be able to understand all things in this life but at some point in the future, all things will be made manifest, God’s mysteries will all be revealed, and we will understand completely and confess that God’s ways are just.

Those who stand on shaky ground or have been introduced to doubt, instead saturate themselves in what they know is true, doubt their doubts instead of doubting their faith, seek for Heavenly strength and fortify their foundation.

Those burdened with concern for others poor choices, put their efforts into the only source of hope and ultimate power they know – they pray God to soften their heart or bless them with a wake-up call before it’s too late.

Those overwhelmed by their trial pray earnestly for deliverance and seek to learn whatever lesson they are to learn with this situation so that they can move forward.

Those who struggle with depression understand that their perspective is currently tainted and hope for the good moments to break through the darkness to provide some type of relief.  They also understand that this trial is a temporary burden, only during this life, and that they will be free of its grasp for the eternities, if they endure it well.

Those discouraged by their inadequacies, recognize that they are given weaknesses in the flesh for a noble purpose, and God has promised an inheritance to all who magnify their abilities (talents).  And so they put their focus into what they can do, rather than what they are incapable of doing.

The addict humbly realizes that they have used their agency poorly to the point of complete bondage and are incapable of delivering themselves by their own power or even by the support of counselors or well -meaning friends.  Instead, they look to the Savior, accessing the power of the atonement to restore what was deceptively taken from them.

The stuck put their trust in the Lord’s desire for our welfare, knowing that a way is provided, but it is not for us to dictate whether that deliverance occurs in this life or the next.  Always praying and petitioning but still submitting to His will.

The confused eventually trust that the Holy Ghost is the only true source to heed and allow all the other voices, temptations, and options melt into the background.  Again not necessarily understanding completely the error of some options but trusting that the truth will be made clear at some point in the future.

The physically marred can only persevere by their trust that there is purpose in their pain, even if it is only to be an example of how to endure it well.  They understand (in their good moments) that this experience is but a small moment in time and they have the eternities to be immortal and perfected.

The good news is if one identifies themselves in one group but desires to respond to their pain in another – it is a choice.  Oh the power of choice.  

Swaying to the Source

There never seems to be enough time.

I’d like to be able to scroll through facebook each day and read all the interesting articles shared and follow all the conversations and debates that go on – but there isn’t enough time.

But every once in a while, I run across one, no matter how late, and I can’t hit the off button.  The thoughts or points made in a blog post and the comments after are so entrancing that I have to read it in its entirety. 

That happened last night.  I was ready to slip into bed and hopefully slip into peaceful slumber when I checked my notifications.  Someone shared an interesting blog post that had some valid points to consider.  As I read it, I could feel myself being swayed to the author’s points one by one.  It seemed logical and some of the points hit me to the core.  The sad thing - this author was in complete opposition to the course that I had taken. 

After reading the article, I quickly read the comments that were associated with the blog as well as the share on facebook.  The counter comments (supporting the choices I had made) seemed weak and without solid basis.  They were not moving or inspiring or logical in the least.  So I re-read the points in the blog that seemed the most powerful as something to consider analyzing my choice.  Eventually I shut down the devise for the night but it took a while for my mind to shut off.

As I lay in bed and again when I woke up this morning, I considered the arguments I was a spectator to.  Was there merit in them?  So many different perspectives – could both solutions be right or is there an absolute right for everyone?  How does one determine the truth of the matter when contradictory viewpoints both appear to be in the right. 

Then it occurred to me – Consider the source of my dilemma.  The points that logically seemed to have merit, the source was through my logic, my reasoning, and interestingly enough, motivated by my fear.  The points that seemed weak and poorly defended (again – the course I had taken), the source was more of a feeling, an unexplained assurance that it was right, and motivated by a trust that all things would work out for the best in the end. 

So here I had a Vulcan / Betazoid dilemma.  Do I trust the logical right or do I trust the feeling of right?  The head or the heart? The demon on my left shoulder or the angel on my right shoulder?

I suppose I could be wishy-washy and compromise both in a never-ending balancing act or justify the one because of/in spite of the other, but that seemed to be a cop-out and not a solution at all. 

In the end, I’ve concluded that if the heart and head are at opposition, I have to trust my heart.  Both can be flawed, but since I know the spirit of truth works more through my feelings than through my understanding, I would rather err on the side of hope and faith. 

Regarding the points that hit to my core – I thank the author of the blog for pointing out problem areas that need attention.  But I’m going to stay the course – finish the race – and fight the good fight, by persevering in what my heart tells me to be right.  

An Ounce of Prevention

I instantly felt sick.

The moment it dawned on me what was going on, I knew we were in big trouble.

Back story:  We've been receiving overdrawn notices from a bank account we were no longer using for quite a while now.  Every other day it seemed we were being charged $28 - $56 dollars for someone trying to clear a check.  My husband couldn't find the checkbook that the checks were being drawn from so we had no way to contact the creditor.  There are multiple reasons and complicated histories as the why's and how's to this story but the end result happened the other day.

I was finally updating that check register.  Each entry of a bank charge brought a heavy sigh as the debt mounted.  Then as I was verifying a check from my own (or the household) account, I realized what had been going on.  At some point, my husband had taken my checkbook out of my wallet.  And somehow it was replaced with this other, unusable checking account.  That was over two to three months ago.

And so I, unknowingly, had been the one writing all these rubber checks.  I knew his account was messed up because, well, he doesn't have the best financial habits.  But I thought I had a pretty good grip on the household account.  Actually, I thought I was doing better than I should.  The bills were paid, but for some reason I had this big cushion.

Well, the knowledge of that big cushion turned into psychological spending privileges.  I'm ashamed to admit not only for my husband but a little for me as well.

So when I realized what had happened and the sickness was being replaced by fear and anger, I ran to the bank so no more checks would be bouncing.  As it turned out the verdict was worse than I had anticipated.  I thought I would simply write a check from the household account to cover the checks but it turned out being about $2500.00 before bank charges.  That was a lot more than I had to work with.  And the checks that were bouncing were important ones like to the IRS or to help a friend in financial need.  The panic started all over again.

If I had just noted the checkbook when it was put back into my wallet, I could have prevented all of this mayhem.  You know the saying - 'An ounce of Prevention, is worth a Pound of Cure'.

As I was driving the 30 minutes between home and bank, I was trying to pull myself emotionally out of the state I was in.  I figured there was some type of lesson I could learn from this and I could probably blog about it somehow. So I began to consider how this event applied to other areas in my life.  Where had I been deducting from the wrong account and accumulating unnecessary debt or bondage? What other scenarios could be avoided by simply doing a little thing to prevent it.

I found the following parallels:

(Granted these little things are useless at finding a cure if I stand alone - but not doing them won't find a cure either.  I'd much rather err on the side of right so I have a clean conscience than to join the ranks of diseases.)

Freedom.  I remembered I had a similar gut-wrenching reaction when I realized that my choices were limiting or preventing my own and the nation's freedom.  There I was taking handouts from the government, not actively participating in the governing affairs at all, and enjoying the (supposed) freedom it was giving me, all the while not aware of the opportunity costs (or bank charges) it was incurring.  When I realized that I was the one cutting my own throat, it turned out to be a bigger cost than it would have been had I been personally responsible in the first place.  I was bought out - and I felt sick about it.  If I had used an ounce of prevention by not supporting a system that has overstepped its boundaries, then it would never have the power to abuse me.

Money talks.  Similarly I found that I like a good price over product anyday.  Yes, that qualifies me as a tightwad.  I find that I can do without just about anything if I don't like the pricetag attached to it. I despise debt.

This tendency has been debilitating to my own value system on multiple levels. Aside from keeping me stuck in scarcity mentality, experiencing a lot of lacks, operating in fear, etc... I found I could be bought out because the price was the ultimate priority. 

It took some intense internal analysis to decide that there are more important things than saving money. When my getting the best deal gave others an advantage to attack my core values, it was time to re-evaluate my priorities.  The best comparison I've heard is -

  

'sharpening the enemies sword'  

So he could stab me in the back.

By supporting them financially, I was supporting what they would be using the money for.  Now if that had been to build their business to provide jobs for others, increase their financial empire, or even to do some other noble purpose, that would be fine.  I'm good with that.

But when they use those funds to promote such evils as gay rights, or other liberal misguided philanthropy, all causes that I'm opposed to, I've joined the ranks of being a 'useful idiot' in the political world. I didn't see the opportunity cost of buying things cheaply.  My ounce of prevention here is support those businesses that support my values - even if it is more expensive.  The peace of mind far outweighs the cost of the product.

World Views.  There are  A LOT of world views out there.  Philosophies, ideologies, opinions.

What surprises me is the amount of people who adopt a world view without doing their homework.  Or flip from one to another without realizing where their own allegiance lies. Not standing for anything so they fall for everything.

This is probably the biggest opportunity cost because it involves our very direction in life.  If we view life's purpose to be to obtain pleasure... wealth... popularity... build empires... give service... obedience to a higher power... or just to get through with as little injuries as possible - it greatly affects what deposits are being made into what account, what withdrawls are being deducted, and of course, what the charges will result because of it.

If we are depositing our faith and support into one world view, deducting at pleasure, but it is in the wrong bank account - the penalties will be great indeed.

The ounce of prevention here lies in obtaining true truths - not just declaring what 'truth' works to your supposed best advantage.  And then live your life accordingly.  

Hypocrisy is a challenging thing to overcome, but the life of consistent loyalty to THE world view earns many dividends rather than penalties.


I know these little preventions are insignificant to the diseased world we live in.  But the ounce of prevention is a small and simple things that bring great things to pass.

My Victory Formula

It was one of those moments.  I'm sitting there listening to the class being presented when my mind is flooded with word phrases and ideas that seem too profound to just ignore.  I grabbed my portable device and started my finger sliding over the touchscreen keyboard.

Yes, I was probably inspired from the previous class that was on the atonement, and so it may have been the trigger that got my brain working.  But this is what I came up with:

     1.  Access the Atonement
     2.  Gratitude for the Vision
     3.  Meet the Minimum

ACCESS THE ATONEMENT
     All around us, people are building their own Tower of Babels.  Attempting to gain access to something that has only one possible entrance.  Whether it is climbing the ladder of success, setting goals with frequent course corrections, positive mental attitude, working harder or smarter, requesting from the 'universe', or any number of other partial power sources that beat around the bush without hitting the target head on.  

However, the atonement of Christ has genuine power - healing power, purifying power, saving power, redeeming power.  But the power that gets most overlooked is the enabling power.  Why would anyone attempt to be successful without accessing the power which increases their capacities.  

And all that is required to access this pure genuine power is to sacrifice our selfish pride.  Recognizing that we are not enough alone and laying our burden at His feet.  Repenting of the sins we've committed or the good works we've omitted.  Humbly seeking his aid and then submitting to his will, especially if it is contrary to our own.  Receiving His word through pondering, reflecting, and personalizing His teachings in our lives.  

Granted, it is not an easy step, but who ever claimed victory to be an easy process.  

GRATITUDE FOR THE VISION

Vision indicating our vision manifested as well as the vision we hope to create.

Our life's circumstances are the consequences of past choices or . . . opportunities for growth.  What we are experiencing right now is either God's manifestation of respect for our agency (even if it was a poor choice on our part) or a manifestation of His trust in our ability to grow beyond our current status.  Keeping that perspective helps me to be grateful for where I am, even when where I am is sometimes unpleasant.

Being grateful for what will come into our life is an expression of faith that God honors our heart's desire and . . . if it is right for us, will provide for our needs.  Sometimes in unexpected or miraculous ways, but I trust that he loves me enough to create the circumstances that are in my best interest.

MEET THE MINIMUM
There is too much to do in a single day.  There is too many good things to successfully prioritize based on that merit alone.  So when I say meet the minimum, take it with tongue and cheek because it is the goal, not the mandate.  It is the 1% principle.  It is the consistency effort of small and simple things.  It is the default when life allows these items to be attended to between crisis or unrelenting schedules.  

Since there is too much to do, especially with children, I like to pray that the most important items will get the proper amount of attention.  That may change from day to day.  One day, relationships may need to be strengthened as a high priority.  Another, it might be more important to put my home, my health, or my finances in order. 

These seven areas are my personal pursuits that require my time and attention in order to maintain as well as progress.  They are:
     1- Physical Activity
            This could be anything from working up a sweat or getting my own drink of water rather than being lazy and asking someone else to do it.
     2- Home Stewardship
            Daily maintaining is essential for my mental health, plus meals and laundry never cease
     3- Study 
            Come face to face with greatness, practice pondering, listening to audiobooks while busy
     4- LOVE
             Strengthening relationships by loving God, spouse, children, friends.
     5- Manage the Money
              Know where my money is, where it is going, and what I want it to do for me.
     6- Be a Force for Good
              This phrase resonates so strong with me that I know this is a deep inner desire.  As long as I keep the desire before me, I hope that I will be able to influence someone in a positive manner.
     7- Mission Momentums
              Momentums are the baby steps that get the ball rolling.  Once in motion, it tends to stay in motion, so I want to regularly do the babystep momentums that that will help me fulfill my life's mission.

There it is.  My Victory Formula.  Even if it doesn't produce the goals or material success that I perceive as necessary in my life, I know I will experience inner peace by focusing on these three things.  And inner peace is truly a Victory.